Complaints

The “Attitude” that’s WORSE for our Kids’ HEALTH than McDonalds AND Ruins Lives!

Nutrition is the portal to wellness for sure, but the fact is, it’s just the beginning of the journey toward lasting, vibrant, resilient health! The right nutrition will fuel both “inner” and “outer” wellness toward its optimal potential whilst the “WRONG” nutrition causes emotional disturbances and physical irritations of ALL kinds…

It’s long been known that food profoundly impacts our physical wellness AND our mood! BUT, did you know that our emotional well-being DIRECTLY impacts our physical well-being! Our inner (mental and emotional) world drives our physical experience so it’s absolutely vital that we gain an understanding of the implications for ourselves AND our children pretty quickly given the dire “health” predictions for our kids!

Emotional intelligence plays a significant role in determining the level of success we experience in relationships, career, connection, finding meaning and purpose, our HEALTH &  HAPPINESS! The scariest part to me is that we AREN’T taught this stuff when it matters, as kids! So we grow up (ish) to become adults carrying a lifetime of emotional baggage because we were and usually still are ill equipped to handle the “mess” (emotions).

What if our kids had the benefit of learning from our mistakes AND our wisdom. What if your kids were Empowered Kids with a tool belt and strategies to handle their “inner” world with style and grace and process experiences, feelings and thoughts in a manner that supported their optimal physical and emotional health and set them up for an extraordinary experience in life?

It starts with understanding our emotions and as parents we must learn how to do this so we can teach our kids! They are learning how to be in this world from us so if our skills need a polish, what better incentive than your child’s FUTURE health and happiness!

Psychological research has shown that most adults struggle to identify beyond the 7 basic emotions BUT being able to identify and articulate 30 is an indicator of emotional intelligence. Woah baby! I fell short on that one, how about you?

This is part of the fabulous program delivered through Empowered Emotions!

If our emotional well-being is such a HUGE predictor of our health and happiness in life, it means we’ve been short changed and our kids will be the ones to suffer!

Which leads me to the #1 “attitude” that will guarantee a miserable life and have FAR reaching ramifications for physical AND emotional well-being:

COMPLAINING

Complaining is the end result of an inability to process life “experiences” appropriately, AKA poor emotional intelligence. It can be a learnt behaviour AND a habit and reflects our “negative” perceptions NOT our positive ones.

Complaining is a clue that our  focus in on what we DON’T want and can have a frequent part to play in our lives until we realise the “damage” it does and choose to learn better responses. The science of physics tells us that we attract more of what we are energetically focused on, what’s your frequency set to?

You see complaining about our dissatisfactions (the weather, people, our job, the state of the world, poor service…) has an interesting impact on our psyche and CAN over time contribute to our feeling of helplessness, hopelessness and victimisation! It can ALSO impact our mood, our self-esteem AND our general mental health. Complaining is widely accepted as the key attitude that WILL prevent your BEST experience of life; ouch…

Complaining can create negative energy; we are made up of MORE energy than matter so it doesn’t take a physicist to figure out THAT outcome!

In July 2006, Reverend Will Bowen had a vision of people focusing on and talking about the things they desire, rather than complaining about how things are. Bowen began teaching a series on prosperity which included the exploration of forming the habit of gratitude. Bowen purchased purple bracelets and asked the congregation to put them on one arm. When they caught themselves complaining they moved the bracelet to the other arm. This was repeated until they could go 21 days without complaining. Bowen’s idea of a “complaint free world” is now known worldwide with nearly 10 million purple bracelets sent to people in more than 106 countries.

Complaining can become like a freight train out of control which from a neuroscience perspective reinforces those neural loops that become like a negative feedback cycle so you get MORE of what you are focusing on! It’s a cycle that NEEDS to be re-routed. Much harder to do as  adults, MUCH easier for  kids to learn when they are evolving in life!

The stress caused as a result of complaining has a lasting and negative impact on the brain. Studies have shown that even a few days of stress damages the neurons in the hippocampus (the part of the brain used for problem solving and cognitive function), and impacts neuroplasticity, the ability to create new neurons.

Over time this can result in the hippocampus shrinking, YIKES, which can cause a decline in VITAL cognitive functions such as memory and the ability to adapt to new situations.

A study by Hampel and colleagues (2008) has also found that the hippocampus is one of the first regions of the brain to suffer damage in those who develop Alzheimer’s disease.

Your brain’s hippocampus is impaired by your own complaining, but it turns out that complaining can be compared to smoking! YOU don’t have to be the one complaining for it to affect YOUR health. Listening to other people complaining can have the same negative impact on the brain, as it does when you are the one doing the complaining.

Research conducted by Professor Sapolsky at Stanford’s medical school found that exposure to just 30 minutes of complaining and negativity (including viewing this on TV) per day can physically damage your brain. Sapolsky’s study also revealed that exposure to complaining and negativity causes your brain to have the same emotional reaction as that experienced when stressed.

Ok, so what’s the solution? It’s clear that complaining is BAD for health and happiness so finding ways to “catch” yourself in the act is called for and replacing it with a far MORE empowering, health driving approach.

One thing that complaining PREVENTS is the kind of “solution” oriented thinking that underpins a profoundly more positive and successful experience in life.

If this conversation has sounded some “alarm” bells for you then why not work on becoming a closer observer of your thoughts AND words AND because this attitude will likely have been a little contagious with the kids, gently steer them toward a more “solution” oriented approach.

We CAN become empowered with robust “inner” awareness and tools to manage life effectively and teach them to our kids! In fact, it’s up to us so if you are ready to step into your MOST Empowered self then join the upcoming “Empowered Emotions” Event in Busselton on April 1st and walk away with the exact blueprint for long lasting INNER and OUTER resilience, peace, harmony and joy for YOU and YOUR CHILDREN!

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